Pisgah United Methodist Church
Sunday, May 20, 2012
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77 Times? Seriously?September 11, 2011 13th Sunday of Kingdomtide
Romans 14: 1-12, Matthew 18: 21-35
Have you ever had such an injury that you were changed forever? I think of veterans, and those wounded in the line of duty, who loose parts of themselves.
The attack of September 11, 2001 was just such an injury to our country. It was a landmark event for the people of the United States of America, because from that point forward we have changed. In my lifetime I can recall only one other event that impacted my psyche in a similar way. That event was the assassination of Pres. John F. Kennedy, on November 22, 1963. It is the same for 9/11; I remember exactly where I was, who I was with, and what I was doing.
On September 11, 2001 I was at home preparing for a trip to Buffalo, New York to host a military reunion. I was living in Morganton then. Ed called me on the phone and said, "Something is happening in New York City. Turn on the TV." So I did, and watched in horror as the events of the day unfolded. I venture to say that each of you who are old enough to remember that day, can recount your own story of where you were and what you were doing on 9/11.
Today is the ten-year anniversary of the day in world's history that is marked as "pre" and "post" 9/11. This is not the kind of anniversary that we celebrate, but rather it is the kind that we remember with sadness and grief. We think about the people who lost their lives that day. Some were on-board the hijacked airplanes; some at work in the twin towers; some on duty at the Pentagon; some were rushing in to save others.
The display on our altar this morning has been designed to honor all that this nation lost on that day: firefighters, police officers, rescue workers, priests and clergy people, American soldiers, friends, sons and daughters, moms and dads, and our sense of safety and security we had living within the borders of our country. September 11, 2001 was an injury that has indeed changed us forever.
Have you ever wondered why it is that you and I can so vividly and clearly remember the details of 9/11? I thought about that this week. I believe these moments are sealed into our memories, because they are accompanied by such strong emotions and feelings.
That Tuesday morning in September began the kind of of day that we all love. It was a cool, clear, sunny, bright morning. (Just like this one.) But as I watched my TV screen, the emotions of horror, disbelief, fear, and pains of heart and soul were seared into my psyche. In the days which followed, as reporters tried to number the dead, as the skies became quiet and devoid of those long airplane contrails, my mind was filled with a thousand thoughts; a thousand questions.
I know I was not unique, but rather we as a people, as Americans were all going through the horror together. And together we tried to come to some understanding of what it means to forgive in the face of such an injury.
Our country did indeed suffer a great loss on September 11, 2001. In learning to live with and to forgive what happened that day has been a long and arduous process of healing for all of us. We will not nor should we forget. We must always remember those who died, and acknowledge our great loss. But, thanks be to God, there is hope for forgiveness, healing, reconciliation and peace.
In our gospel lesson today, Jesus answers Peter's question about forgiveness in a clear and straightforward manner: forgiveness is not a matter to be counted, but a matter to be considered. Peter wanted to have a limit on forgiveness, and he chose the number 7. (Seven was a special number which means completion, and maybe Peter thought of it as doing what was due.) But Jesus told Peter that there is no limit on forgiveness. The number (77 or 77 x 7) that Jesus told Peter was a euphemism for a number too large to count, like we might say, "a gazillion times."
Jesus illustrated this point with a parable. He compared the kingdom of God to a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As we read, one of the King's servants had a debt that he could not pay. And when the servant heard the penalty he would incur for his debt, that he, his wife and his children would be sold, he was filled with fear. He begged the king for more time...more time to pay his debts.
The King was merciful, forgave his servant and released him from the debt he could not pay. And then it was the servants turn to forgive. Yet, even though he had been forgiven, he himself was not willing to forgive his fellow servant.
Jesus said that God expects you and I to forgive as we have been forgiven, otherwise our life will be full of torturous living. To me this story is Jesus' way of holding up a mirror before Peter. Jesus hopes that Peter will see that forgiveness is reflective of a heart condition.
If we approach God, and we ask God to forgive us for our own sins, but our hearts are not changed, what does that say about our sincerity? Can we, do we really expect God to forgive us, when we cannot forgive?
Hearing Jesus say that our heavenly father will not forgive us unless we forgive our sisters and brothers from our hearts is a difficult thing to hear. It is difficult because some injuries seem to be unforgivable. Some offenses against us impact our lives like 9/11 impacted this country.
Jesus said in the parable, we servants of God will indeed live a torturous life when we carry unforgiveness. When we are not able to forgive, we become bitter, resentful, angry; we carry a chip on their shoulders, avoid one another, think badly of one another; it goes on and on making us heartsick, emotionally sick and sometimes physically sick. Unforgiveness destroys relationships and shuts down the openness we should have with one another as brothers and sisters in Christ.
John Oglethorpe, a friend of John Wesley, allegedly told Wesley, “I never forgive.” Mr. Wesley wisely replied, “Then, sir, I hope that you never sin.”[1] I am so thankful that God does not place limits on forgiving me. I am reminded of what that would mean for me by the words of the 4th century theologian, Augustine of Hippo, "If you, Lord, keep the score of our iniquities, then who, Lord, [could] bear it?"[2]
No one pretends that forgiving is easy to do. C.S. Lewis called it a hard thing and said, "Only, I think, by remembering where we stand,..meaning our words when we say in our prayers each night, 'Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us!' We are offered forgiveness in no other terms. To refuse God's terms is to refuse God's mercy for ourselves."[3]
I wonder how many of us here today carry around thoughts, feelings of anger and resentment because of something or someone that we cannot forgive? It may help to remember:
What forgiveness is not:
· condoning wrong behavior
· forgetting about what happened
· pretending it did not happen
· what it will erase the pain
· reconciliation
· dealing with consequences
· something that will change someone else
What forgiveness is:
· acknowledging feelings, hurt, grief, disappointment, sadness
· remembering our own weaknesses and failings
· making a decision to bear the burden of another's wrongdoing
· making a decision to forgive
· begin a process of reconciliation
Who is it that you cannot forgive? Who is it that hurt you so badly? The person may be dead and gone, but the power over you still lingers. That person could easily sit week after week on the pew in front of you.
When Peter said, should I forgive seven times, Jesus shook his head. A gazillion times. But Jesus, you don't understand. She broke my heart, and dragged my feelings through a gravel pile. She betrayed me. A gazillion times. But Jesus, he tore up my life. He lied through his teeth and I lost my job and my life has never been quite the same sense. A gazillion times. But Jesus, you don't understand how it is. He abused me for years on end. I still carry the scars. I can't let it go. A gazillion times. You don't know how they hurt my daddy, he was a good man. A decent human being. And they just broke his heart. I can't go back to church. A gazillion times. A gazillion times.
Lincoln:
The story goes that when the Civil War ended a group gathered outside the White House. President Lincoln came out to say a few words to the crowd. It was a great time of celebration. The band was there. The president talked briefly about the horrors of war and then he joked a little because he had a sense of humor. The people were delighted and exuberant because they had won the war that had been going on for 4 years. Lincoln talked about how important it was to get back together and to heal the nation's wounds and let brothers and sisters join each other again. Then he said. "In a few moments, I want the band to play and I'm going to tell them what I want them to play."
The crowd thought he would get them to play "the Battle hymn of the Republic" a song that had become their theme song. But instead Lincoln said," I wonder if we, in winning the war, have the right now to play the music again... If maybe that's not appropriate." That should have been a clue to what he was going to say. Because he turned to the band and said "now this is what I want you to play...I want you to play, Dixie." The band almost dropped their instruments. For a minute they just stood there with the crowd, openmouthed. They looked at one another. They didn't have the music for Dixie. They had not played Dixie for a long, long time. Then after a long pause the band finally got together, and they played Dixie. There was not a dry eye in the crowd.
When we forgive, we play music we never thought we could play; we sing songs we thought we could never sing. I believe that when the church learns to forgive one another, then maybe we can teach the world to forgive. Peace and reconciliation begin in the heart that truly forgives. Even... A gazillion times. Amen.
©2011 Judy H. Eurey
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